The Flu Before Christmas

This one is for an anonymous family member (feel better)!

Inspired by the poem by Clement C. Moore:


‘Twas the night sweats and shivers, and I felt like a louse;

Germ gremlins were crawling all over the house;

Tissues were strewn about without care;

All hoped that a doctor soon would be there;

The children were drugged up, stuffed up in their heads;

While dribbles of Nyquil ran down the lengths of their beds;

And mamma with her ‘kerchief, and I with my nightcap,

Had just hunkered down, if not for a dirt nap,

When out on the lawn their arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my bed…and lost control of my bladder.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tripped over the curtains and ripped down the sash.

The feeling you get when your nose gets too cold?

I held up a tissue, and then I did blow.

Then what to my blood-shot eyes did appear,

But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny deer.

Actually, they were stars circling around my sore head,

But how’s I to know the difference? I should be in bed!

So here me exclaim as I drop out of sight:

Merry Christmas to all, and to all gesundheit!

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